This will most likely be my last entry on this journal.  I've had a hard time making the decision but I've made it.  I have begun journaling at http://alittletlc.livejournal.com/ .

I changed places for a few reasons.  One, I like some of the things this new blog offers and it costs less.  I also like how easy it is to befriend others.  Another reason is simply because I think that I did with this journal what I needed to do.

I actually find it sad to close out this journal which is why I had trouble letting go of it.  I have worked out so many things in the various blogs here.  I've worked through some of my fears and my old wounds.  I've written about the agonizing time of my brother's suicide and the heart breaking time of dealing with watching my father die of cancer.

On the pages of this journal I've imprinted much of what is in my heart and mind.  For anyone who has read much here you now know some things about me and the type of person I am. 

While in the new journal I will at times "work out things" by writing I think it is a little more light hearted.  Or maybe it feels that way because it doesn't contain the things I went through on this journal. 

I may use a few of these posts on the new one, but only the ones I feel are really special to me.

Wow, I'm actually finding myself feeling a little emotional while writing this.  I feel like I'm saying goodbye to an old friend.

Sarah

I just finished reading an article about the rebates that will be going out to people starting on Monday, a week earlier than projected. What I found more interesting were the comments people made on the article.

They were excitedly awaiting their money so they could buy the things they want. Among the list were trips, new furniture, shopping sprees and the like. It would be interesting to know how many among them had debt they were not paying on. How many had credit card debt that they were making minimum payments , medical bills not paid, bills sitting in collections ruining their credit.

Many of the comments were complaints from people about how the money was being distributed. It is being released on a schedule that goes by the last two digits in your social security number. Of course the angry people were the ones who will get theirs toward the end. Instead of seeing some financial relief coming they are irritated because they are last. No one wants to be last. Have to get that money fast so it can be spent fast. Instead of being happy they have something coming they'd rather bitch about how it's being done. Sounds like spoiled children if you ask me.

It's no wonder our government is in a financial mess. They suffer from the very thing that most Americans suffer from. Entitlement. "I want this therefore I should have it" syndrome. Why should we expect the government to be any different than many of the people in this country.

I read an article the other day that gave some American debt statistics. Home equity debt and credit card debt has risen about 10% in the first quarter of this year. What is being put into this debt is changing. More of the credit card debt is food and gas. That is scary. That is saying people are living beyond their means to the point of not really being able to afford the necessities.

Now some of you might look at that and say it's because jobs aren't paying well and prices are going up. There is some truth to that. But the real reason most people are in debt is because they don't live within their means and make bad choices with their money. Giving them more money wont help because they will just continue to use those bad habits on whatever other money they receive. I heard someone say one time that you don't solve money problems with more money. I couldn't agree more.

It amazes me how many people steal and do not call it stealing. I personally know people who have run up credit card debt because they knew they were going to file bankruptcy anyway. That is stealing. Everyone one of the people who DO pay their bills help cover the cost of those losses to the companies. So when you screw a company, you are also screwing your family and friends.

I sometimes find myself wondering when cells phones, cable and Internet became more important than honoring debts. When did they become necessities in life. I've known people who let debt hit their credit report and receive threats of having utilities shut off but heaven forbid they pay those things before TV, Computer and the all mighty Cell Phone.

Why am I venting about all this? I guess I'm just tired of listening to selfish undisciplined people complain about money. At least the ones that are where they are because they chose poorly and have no desire to be different. The comments at the end of that article really set me off.

People are "bound" because of what they allow themselves to do financially. They want their "things". There is so much freedom in being at least somewhat free of debt. Then if hard times do hit, they can tighten up a little and still survive.

Note: I am not talking about people who are in or near poverty level incomes. I know they have a struggle. My heart goes out to those in that situation.

Okay...rant over..... for now.

L is out of town. While it's been fun having some free time and doing a few nights out with some friends I miss him.

Last night G and I met up with one of her friends. I took my cards. We had a nice dinner and a fun chat. As the night wore on I ended up doing a little reading for her and we let her talk. She really needed someone to talk to someone.

Today I needed to do something positive and physical. I asked my daughter and grand kids if they wanted to go on a hike with me and they said yes. Shortly after our conversation my daughter called me back. Her husband who was traveling back from racing his quad heard we were going and in a very whiny voice said to my daughter "I want to go hiking with Mom." How can anyone resist that. We waited until he got home then headed to one of the local parks. It was a great day for a hike. Afterward we sat around in the grass talking then all had lunch together. It was a nice time.

It's heading toward 9 o'clock at night and I feel a little restless. I was hesitant about making any plans for this evening because I was very tired due to not sleeping well the last few nights. Now I find myself wishing I had planned a little something.

I feel like I'm getting a lot of the issues settled that have popped up into my life lately.

The tooth I broke is now sporting a nice new crown. The reason they call it a crown is because they are every bit as costly as a jewel studded crown

The car with the blown engine has been replace with a new car. I think L will be happy with the car. We wrapped up the car sale just in time to meet new friends for lunch. It is a couple from Columbus that we met through mutual friends. I really enjoyed getting to know them. They are people who truly value self growth. Gawd, I do love people like that!!

As soon as lunch was over we went to where our poor broken car was setting and got all of L's "stuff" out of it. Came home, took a quick nap, then headed over to spend a few hours with the grandkids. On the way there I found out that my best friend's mother had passed. This was not a horrible thing. She was very much ready to go and the family had come to terms with the situation. While she will be greatly missed, the family is choosing to celebrate her life rather than her death. She was the only person that I ever allowed myself to see as a potential "second mom". She was a very cool fun lady that I feel very blessed to have crossed my path.

After plying the grandkids with ice cream and toppings, playing a game with them and getting lots of hugs I went to my friend's house so she wouldn't be alone. I spent the night and helped her get things ready for the company we knew would be dropping in. At first she said she didn't think people would be stopping by or bringing food. I looked at her like she was crazy. She comes from an Italian family. Of COURSE they were going to be bringing food!!!!

Tomorrow I have a doctor appointment that I am both dreading and looking forward to. I'm looking forward to it because it involves a situation that is actually scaring me a little and I want it handled. I'm dreading it because I don't want them to do what they are going to have to do.

Anyway I feel like problems are being solved. I feel like I've been in a place of having to live my life reactionary instead of being proactive. I feel like when I'm living reactionary that I'm not as empowered. I'm putting out fires instead of building. But, it's okay. The fires are being put out and I can get back to planning productive things.

  The Iris', Daffodils, Crocus and Tulips have broken ground and are a few inches tall!!!  The trees have buds on them!!!!  The air smells less like winter and more like spring!!! 

Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!